“What the f@#k is juice?!”

When my husband visits an Asian grocery store, he often will buy me a food item featuring Hello Kitty. Recently he bought me two Calpico beverages. While I enjoyed the adorable Hello Kitty images, I most certainly did not like the completely artifical “strawberry” and “mango” drinks. I did appreciate that unlike some other fruit imposters, Calpico is totally upfront about how fake it is. It feels almost like the company is proud of it. On the back of the bottle, above the nutrition facts, it says in bold letters, “Contains 1% Juice.”

Dave Chappelle does a hilarious commentary on food and race, including the difference between grape juice and grape “drink.” WARNING: contains NSFW language, including the n-word.

All kidding aside, millions of kids across America–particularly poor kids of color–are growing up consuming gallons of assorted flavors of “drink.” What’s wrong with that? As Dave says, “Ain’t no vitamins in that shit.”